Urinal cameras with automated penis shaker arms that automatically measure the male population by penis size and organize them in alphabetical order.
Alright roll call!
Albert 6"!
Hugeman 8.7".
Little Stwert 9.2"!I got tagged and fined by one of these last week.
Shake it once, you’re fine.
Shake it twice you’re ok.
Shake it three times…
wait if it can measure penis size then you don’t have to organize them in alphabetical order
or install some sort of scanner at the door to look for penises and balls
No they won’t. Our buildings and infrastructure are too old for this.
The only republicans worried about this issue are the ones who have sucked random dicks off of Craigslist or something
Lindsay Graham enters the chat.
Hey there lady Gray
I bet they will, they’re a bunch of child-raping pedos.
Lmfaoooo
As fucking awful and dystopian as this shit is, I know one particular motherfucker who is about to get his shit rocked administration style.
Welder I worked with at the coast guard was the laziest, most disgusting individual I have ever had the misfortune of meeting. He would regularly take 45+ minute “bathroom breaks” where he would sit in the stall on the phone with his wife or even straight up go to sleep sitting on the toilet. On the few occasions he actually needed to go, he would STILL TALK ON THE PHONE TO HIS WIFE.
WHAT THE ACTUAL GROWN UP FUCK.
I cannot fucking fathom a universe in which it is ever permissible to chitchat on the phone at work with your spouse while taking a shit. Never have I seen such little class or dignity in a professional setting. I asked my super about it and he said they’ve tried talking to him about it and he just does not see any problem with his behavior. Any other industry would get rid of him in a fucking heartbeat but government was always so scared of any kind of discrimination or cultural insensitivity complaint that they never addressed it. Now?
Now that guy is super fucked and it couldn’t have happened to a bigger piece of shit.
Lmaoo
See? Trump said he’d create new jobs, and now you can start an exciting new career Disappearing Undesirables, or maybe even become an Official Military Restroom Pecker-Checker! Are we great again yet?
Sargeant of Short Arms
Having been in the military, I am acutely aware of just how soul crushing this is going to be for servicemembers.
I would rank it below suicide watch duty but above unit mandatory fun day duty
Your tax dollars at work. Just to keep an eye out for that abuse and fraud!
Cool now you have guys watching woman restrooms, great job idiots
Private inspector.
Is that a rank or title? Just wondering if I can make it to Major Private Inspector
Dick Check
Imagine serving because you believe that you’re protecting the country from a foreign military threat, only to be tasked with verifying genital compliance for bathrooms.
It would be better to shovel shit. Way more honour and respect from society.
I don’t believe this will be sufficient. How can we be sure that the officer (no way we can entrust this to a grunt) that inspects your genitals is doing his job (and not enjoying it)? I want someone watching that soldier!
In the American Regime, the military checks your peepees to put you into the bathroom they deem appropriate
HOW DOES THIS LOWER THE COST OF LIVING?
It doesn’t. But in true bully fashion, they only feel better about themselves by making someone else’s life worse and they don’t have to expend any effort or sacrifice making their own life objectively better.
The Daily Show has a nice piece on this anti-trans bullshit in the 'murican military.
I’m getting sick and tired of all this and i’m in the group that it’s cool to dogpile on du jour, just make all bathrooms mixed already: sinks up front, cubicles in the middle with floor to ceiling doors, urinals at the back. There, done.
As a bonus a lot more people will wash their hands.
Motels might lose some money though.But if we do something logical like this conservatives will only be left with 1,325,975 completely pointless things to whine and cry and stir up their base about.
Unacceptable.
Conservatives crying instead of finding reasonable solutions is an American institution. We must preserve it.
