• ZMonster@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    Are you kidding? What I wouldn’t give to be my company’s customer support.

    “Hi-… Wait, hang on. There’s a specific thingyyy… we… are… sup-poooooooost-AHAH. Here it is, okay. [In sarcastic fancy voice] How can I help you? Lol, I should have been like “Welcome to Costco, I love you” right? hilarious. Idiocracy. And we are living it now. Sad. So… How can I help you?”

    Oh wow, that’s quite the conundrum. Hey, you should get assistance. Hah, jk. Gotcha. No this is an easy one. I mean, you’ve definitely got a PEBKAC issue but no worries. Let’s start by-

    Hey, you and me both. In fact most of the people I work with prefer to work with someone else, hah. But hey, wysiwyg, right? So, let’s go. Before we start though, just FYI, it’s pronounced comfortable.

    Uh, actually, no you didn’t. You said “I’m not comf-TER-a-ble with you helping me.” What you should have said was “I’m not com-FORT-a-ble with you helping me - com FORT a ble. See?

    Fair enough, but it’s not my fault you skipped the first day of pronunciation school. Baby’s first grammar lesson amiright? Hello?”

    Hello?

    Whoa, that was under a minute! Mark it on the board. Mark it zero! Donny. Remember that? Oh wait, no, it was Walter! Because he would always say, shut the FUCK up, Donny. That’s why I got them mixed up. I always do that with Big Lebowski. Walter. Calmer than you are hah. Good movie. Oh shit, was I supposed to answer that?

      • ZMonster@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        I am fully spectrummed, so you may be. But I’m also ADD comorbid with a truckload of trauma so I don’t where that puts me any more. I mean, other than psychotherapy. Because that is absolutely figuratively where it has put me. And I can’t think of an actual place I’d rather be. You are invited to my birthday party.

        OH OH OH!!! I know a lot of really cool bridges. I won’t tell you. You have to find them. But you will enjoy them.